The Emily Jean

 

The Emily Jean

 

Exercise might as well be a 4­-letter-­word in my book. And as much as I love to cuss, that word really makes my skin crawl. It ranks right up there with “moist” ­- which as all my friends know, is only referred to as “the M word.”

For me, exercise was always done to one extreme or another. Just like dieting & bingeing. Exercising meant 6 days/week barre workouts, 2-­hour cardio sessions, 1/2 marathon training or Crossfit WOD’s where I got so dizzy I couldn’t actually walk. OR, the backlash of exhaustion, frustration and disgust with myself where you’d find me curled up on the couch with a book.

Exercise was never done for FUN. Only for weight loss. For shrinking my body to something it wasn’t naturally. And when I finally got exhausted by one obsessive exercise, I’d realize I was miserable, give the gym a big middle finger and crawl back to my couch no matter how close I seemed to be to the illusive “thigh gap” I thought I needed.

Utterly defeated.

Until I’d wake up again from another food & fiction­-reading binge to berate myself for my disgustingness and repeat the whole damn thing again.

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

Restrict. Binge. Repent.

Exercise was always BFF’s with dieting. So when I broke up with dieting, I broke up with exercise. For a bit it sort of looked like another couch ­binge­fest, but something had shifted. Instead of waking up in a blind panic of self-­hatred, convinced

I MUST CHANGE MY BODY NOW!

I woke up with a different mindset. Just as I had in finding balance with food.

Now that I’d made the decision to choose foods from a place of self-­love versus deprivation and self­hatred, what if I did the same for the way I moved my body?

It started slowly, just stepping away from computer work for a break and instead of going to the kitchen, I’d head outside for walk.

Around the same time I started going to yoga classes regularly. The thought of yoga being “exercise” wasn’t even there. Yoga was just MOVEMENT. It was quiet, it was ME time. I wasn’t there to “tone my abs” or squat my way to a better booty. I was just there to move. To see what would happen.

What happened was pretty freaking awesome.

Without even realizing it, my body started being capable of things I’d never even considered. My arms got stronger, all of a sudden down-­dog actually was the “resting pose” those damn instructors kept going on about.

And then? Well then all of a sudden a headstand became my favorite way to start the day, or bust me out of a crap­-mood.

And instead of quantifying every class by how many calories I must have burned, I tuned into how my body and my mind felt after class.

Tired. Alive. Thankful.

Now the question each day becomes, “How do I want to move today? What will make me feel more alive, more IN MY BODY?’

Right now it looks like a lot of walking, some short runs when I have a bunch of pent up energy, occasional biking, and yoga nearly every day.

The difference now is that this movement, this connection to my body is me treating myself with LOVE. It’s not “exercise” it’s movement. The distinction has made all the difference for me, and comes from a place of FUN.

No psychotic boot-­camp-­Barbie yelling at me to get my ass “bikini ready,” or crazed WOD-­heads bonding over the fact that their legs gave out on them when they walked to their car.

Nuh uh, no more. And it’s kinda great.

~ * ~

 

So what’s your relationship to “the E word”? Have you found a way to move from a place of love instead of forcing yourself to need to change?

Share your experience in the comments and let me know what works for you or where you struggle to make this a part of your body and life-love adventure!

Emily Jean is a Certified Holistic Health Coach who specializes in working with women to heal their broken relationships with food, movement & their bodies. Together she helps them create balance throughout their lives, so they can start living and loving life RIGHT NOW instead of “when I lose 15lbs.”

Emily would like to invite any of Krystal’s followers to contact her at hello{at}theemilyjean{dot}com to inquire about a FREE PowerSoul Session. If you are tired of the constant diet roller coaster, looking for balance in food & movement so you can finally LOVE your body and your life, be sure to get in touch with her!

4 replies
  1. Raissa
    Raissa says:

    YES YES YES ! It totally resonates with what I’m committed to right now !
    Liz DiAlto introduces me to it. Thank you for this beautiful article ! You and Emily are my new AWESOME newsletters ! <3

    Reply

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. […] are some ideas: – Movement. (Notice I didn’t say exercise! Read this post to find out why) Dance like Beyoncé. Go for a walk in the woods. Stretch. Jump rope. Go for a run. Whatever feels […]

  2. […] Want to hear more? Head on over to my fabulous friend Krystal’s blog to get the scoop on Why I’m Never Exercising Again! […]

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