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Desire Mapping the New Year

desire-mapping

 

The New Year is almost here and as you may know from previous years, I no longer set New Year’s Resolutions. They have never really worked for me. Instead I had started to set New Year Intentions. If you want to know what the difference is, you can read all about it here.

However, last year I tried something else entirely. While I was away in Mexico with my bestie for the holidays, together we listened to Danielle Laporte’s Desire Map audiobook. Desire Mapping is all about goal setting based on your core desired feelings. In order to set your goals, you first must go inwards and explore what your soul desires to feel in the year ahead. What emotions? What sensations? How do you wish to experience life? What are your core desired feelings for the next year?


From my own inner exploration I found my core desired feelings for 2016 were:

  • BOLD
  • PLAYFUL
  • PASSIONATE
  • AMOROUS
  • AUTHENTIC
  • GROUNDED

Once you have identified your core desired feelings, you develop the intentions and goals that will help you experience these feelings.

To experience feeling BOLD, PLAYFUL and PASSIONATE, I knew I wanted to get back into dance. So when the opportunity to be the Artistic Supervisor for Queerlesque as part of this year’s NWT Pride Festival presented itself, it was a clear YES! And when I was asked to audition for the Yellowknife Dance Collective, I was so scared it made me nauseated, but I knew I had set an intention for the year and this was the perfect way to feel bold, playful and passionate. Auditioning was the best decision ever! Auditioning gave me the inspiration I needed to start renting a studio once a week to free dance. My friend and I would go together and we are so comfortable with each other that we could wear whatever we wanted (ME: booty shorts) and just GET WEIRD. It was probably the most powerful BODY LOVE activity I have done in a while. Anytime I would look in the mirror and hear negative thoughts like, “Oh my god, you have so much cellulite,”, that thought would almost immediately be replaced with, “Look at how beautifully my body moves!”. And my wonder at the beauty of my dancing body truly drowned out any other thoughts.

Creative dance projects goal achieved!

To experience feeling BOLD, PLAYFUL, PASSIONATE, AMOROUS and AUTHENTIC I wanted to go on an adventure. I wanted a BODY LOVE TOUR with my LOVE. It all came together with my Summer Body Love Yoga Tour. When I look back on that time that we shared, the experiences we had, the connections I made with people across Canada and the confidence and freedom I felt, it makes my heart burst with joy. They were experiences of a lifetime. If you’d like to read more about them you can here.

Body Love Yoga Tour with my babe goal achieved!

To experience feeling GROUNDED and AUTHENTIC I wanted to get my financial house in order. Since becoming a small business owner I have been very focused on making sure that my business was running well, but I wanted to take my money management to the next level and I wanted to work to get past any blockages I had to a mindset of abundance. For this I turned to the amazing Denise Duffield-Thomas’ book, Lucky Bitch, and the effect this had on my life is big enough for a whole separate blog post. But suffice it to say that I knocked this goal out of the park and will be debt free as of July 2017!

Money mindset for abundance goal achieved!

To experience feeling BOLD, AUTHENTIC and GROUNDED I wanted to finally launch the project I had been dreaming about for three years, The Luscious Life Program, my online Body Love Yoga Program. I have been dreaming about this since the summer of 2013. Every year it was on my business plan. And every year other projects took priority. But this was my year! It was with a deep sense of pride and self-love that in November of 2016 I launched The Luscious Life Program! And with that I had achieved a goal three years in the making, but also by November 7, 2016 I had achieved all of my goals for the year! Which meant I could actually start turning my mind to 2017 before it got here.

Launch The Luscious Life Program goal achieved!


So basically 2016 kicked ass and I kicked its ass!

2017 is looking like it will also be an amazing year! I’m turning 40! I’m opening my own studio! I’m going to Maui with my babe to celebrate our birthdays! I’m going on a European Body Love Tour in the spring! And I have even more surprises and excitement planned for you that I can’t wait to share!

How did your 2016 goals go? What are your core desired feelings for 2017? I wanna hear all about them!

xox

Krystal

RADICAL INTENTIONS FOR SELF-LOVE

Happy New Year everybody!

with RADICAL INTENTIONS FOR SELF-LOVE

In my blog this week I am revisiting a post from 2 years ago, “Radical Intentions for Self-Love”. It was one of the first blog posts I ever wrote and I still believe in the message.

With the New Year comes reflection and projection. We look back on our year and assess how we did, how we felt and what did we achieve and we use this information to dream and scheme about what we want for our lives in the coming year.

I love this process. I am a big fan of learning as much as I possibly can from my experiences. And I am kinda addicted to planning. Seriously. It’s one of my favourite procrastination and stalling techniques for when I am about to launch into something scary and that my heart is attached to. From all of this reviewing and planning we start to develop goals for the next year. And goals can be very healthy and helpful guideposts for how we want to live our lives.

In the loving your body to wellness world, the New Year and the New Year’s resolutions that come with it are dangerous territory. It can seem like everyone around us is setting food restriction and exercise regimen resolutions. It’s tempting to jump on board.

But most of these New Year’s resolutions have been “broken” by January 15. Setting you up to feel like a failure and that’s definitely not my wish for the start of my 2016.

Instead of New Year resolutions, I would like to offer the concept of New Year intentions.

Resolutions are hard. Immutable. Breakable. There isn’t much room to listen to your body’s wisdom. There isn’t much room to respond to the inevitable unplanned and unforeseen events in our lives. There isn’t room to change our minds. There isn’t much room to learn and grow into a different way of being.

Intentions are open. Responsive. Present. They create space for possibility. Intentions are grounded in listening and being present with what is. They grow as we grow. This is not to say that we cannot bring discipline to our intentions. My favourite definition of discipline is practicing what is possible with consistency. And what a beautiful way that is to think of our intentions, practicing what is possible with consistency!

The Power of Self-Love

Taking this one step further, I’d love to suggest that the intentions be grounded in self-love. We may have a desired change that will come from this intention, but does it pass the self-love and self-compassion test?

  • Will you be able to listen and respond to your body’s needs?
  • Will you experience pleasure as you practice your intention?
  • Will you be living in the present moment?
  • Will your intention help you find greater contentment and gratitude?

Here’s an example of a Resolution versus an Intention:

Resolution – Stop eating sugar to be healthier

The morning of January 4th it’s a big rush to get the kids to school and yourself back to work after all that time off over the holidays and you begin to feel your holiday bliss slipping away. When you get to the office, your co-worker has brought in some delicious looking treats and after the morning you had you just can’t resist. You feel horrible. You feel like a failure. You ate the “bad” sugary food and now you feel bad.

Result = Resolution broken

Intention – Be more present in the moment so that you are eating intuitively and listening to your body’s needs.

The morning of January 4th it’s a big rush to get the kids to school and yourself back to work after all that time off over the holidays and you begin to feel your holiday bliss slipping away. But on the drive to school and work you remember your New Year’s Intention to be more present in the moment and so you take a deep, slow breath and begin to notice the beauty around you. Your kids. The scenery. The anticipation of getting back to work. And once at the office, still living in the present moment, you are offered a delicious looking treat. Rather than feeling like it is the distraction you have to have after that stressful morning, you get to choose whether you want to eat it. You are not good or bad if you eat it. You just eat it or you don’t.

Result = You immediately feel the benefit of this intention and feel empowered to keep up the PRACTICE.

So take the pressure off with a smaller number of New Year’s Intentions that can be reasonably achieved and still make profound changes in your life. Here are a few suggestions of Radical Intentions for Self-Love!

Radical Intentions for Self-Love

  • Let go of worrying about what others think.

Not everyone will like you or always like the choices you make. Stay true to your values and know that you are doing the right thing.

  • Don’t “Should” all over yourself.

As in, “I should go to the gym today”. “Should” represents some externally imposed expectation and comparing ourselves to a perceived cultural ideal and can make us resentful of our own imposed requirements to be a “better” person. Instead of “should” statements ask yourself, “What would be most loving to myself right now?”.

  • Accept what is.

When we accept what is we allow ourselves to be in the flow with life rather than resisting what is. There are things that we can change about our lives, but often it takes time to make those changes and we have to be patient with ourselves. And then there are the things we can’t change. For both the things we can and the things we can’t change, accepting what is releases us from wasting all that time and energy getting frustrated and annoyed.

  • Be in the present moment.

Probably one of the most powerful intentions you could practice. Being in the present moment lowers stress levels, opens you up to more joy, allows you to make better choices, and let’s you see the beauty around you.

What are your Radical New Year Intentions? How will you be practicing great self-love in 2016?

xox

Krystal

How to Love Your Body Through the Holidays

The Reverse Bucket List (1)

The holidays are a peak time for finding yourself in situations that trigger feelings of body shame:

  • all of the chaos and busyness;
  • seeing family you haven’t seen in awhile who think they can freely offer up their opinions on your body;
  • large group meals;
  • food focused events; and
  • New Year, New You pressures.  

I know some of you might even be feeling anxiety about the holidays and your body before we even get there. And I too am starting to get anxious. So for me and for you, here are some posts we can put in our Body Love Toolbox to get through the holidays loving our bodies as best we can and hopefully nip any body loathing feelings in the bud.

  1. From Adios Barbie: How to Stay Body Positive Through the Holidays

I particularly liked the idea of the redirect – when someone inevitably brings up weight loss or their great new diet, try to redirect the conversation back to less body-shaming territory. Like when your friend says she needs to lose 5 lbs so that she can look fabulous in her new dress on New Year’s Eve, try “I am feeling pretty fabulous about rocking these boots with this skirt today!

If you are feeling bold, or just over any shame-y comments friends or loved ones might send your way, instead of the redirect, go for the the directActually, I’m not inviting comments on my body today. Thanks.

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  1. From A Healthy Paradigm: A Body Positive Guide to the Holidays

Being mindful is a great strategy for staying sane and shame-free for the holidays: Mindful of your body’s needs; mindful of how you are feeling; mindful of what you are eating; mindful of your thoughts; mindful of how you are moving your body; and mindful of your environment and any changes you might need to make. Check out the article for more great tips.

  1. From Huffington Post: 4 Tips to Stop Holiday Body Shaming

Food is just food. It is not good or bad. You are not a good or bad person because of what you eat. You are not a more or less valuable person based on how much you weigh. These concepts might be new or unfamiliar to our friends and family. For our friends and family are a part of our body-shaming society too. So I love the tip of openly talking about body-shaming if you are feeling up to pushing against societal norms. And if you are feeling keen you could arm yourself with some data from the Healthy at Every Size website.

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  1. From Persephone Magazine: 5 Body Positive Gift Ideas

This fun list of body positive gift ideas includes some great books and I would add to that list, Dietland, by Sarai Walker, which is an interesting take on flipping the script of our patriarchal society. But I gotta say the Yay! Scale is my fav. After smashing my actual scale a while ago, I’m ready for a more accurate scale that let’s you know how you’re doing this morning from “Lookin’ fine!” to “Hey sexy!”

  1. From Psych Central: Create Your Own Body Positive Traditions

This article offers up some great ideas for creating our own body positive traditions around the holidays to help keep the body-shame at bay. I think I will try the idea of writing a love letter to my body extending gratitude to my body for everything it did for me in 2015 and dreaming about everything I hope we can experience in 2016. Anyone want to join me on this one?

What is in your Body Love Holiday Toolbox? What ideas will you try?

Wishing you all lots of body love this holiday season,

Krystal

P.S. Give the gift of a Personalized Yoga Nidra this holiday 2018! Orders must be place by December 18, 2018 to receive your gift before December 25, 2018.

Intentions for Self-Love

Ditch the reso

Happy New Year everybody! Welcome to 2014!

I know that in the craziness of the New Year and seeing all the New Year’s Resolutions getting posted by everyone, it is hard to resist the temptation of self-improvement goals like, losing weight, eating right and exercising more. And while those typical resolutions can be great for some, most New Year’s resolutions have been broken by January 15. Setting you up to feel like a failure because resolutions are not necessary the best way to make lasting changes in our lives. Now that’s not how you want to start 2014! 

Why intentions rather than resolutions?

Instead I would like to offer the concept of intentions, rather than resolutions. One definition for yoga is “discipline in action”. Our yoga practice is discipline in action. In the same way, intentions can be practiced as discipline in action, rather than a hard resolution that can be broken in a moment. And the discipline of our intentions can be redefined as practicing what is possible with consistency.

The Power of Self-Love

When we focus our intentions on self-love, we are also getting at the root of the change we desire with the typical New Year’s Resolutions. With self-love comes listening to your body’s needs, moving your body for pleasure and finding greater contentment and gratitude. All of which leads to making better choices rather than turning to excess to deal with our negative feelings.

Here’s an example:
Resolution – Stop eating sugar to be healthier
The morning of January 6th it’s a big rush to get the kids to school and yourself back to work after all that time off over the holidays and you begin to feel your holiday bliss slipping away. When you get to the office, your co-worker has brought in some delicious looking treats and after the morning you had you just can’t resist.
Result = Resolution broken 🙁

Intention – Be more present in the moment so that you are eating intuitively
The morning of January 6th it’s a big rush to get the kids to school and yourself back to work after all that time off over the holidays and you begin to feel your holiday bliss slipping away. But on the drive to school and work you remember your New Year’s Intention to be more present in the moment and so you take a deep, slow breath and begin to notice the beauty around you. Your kids. The scenery. The anticipation of getting back to work. And once at the office, still living in the present moment, you are offered a delicious looking treat. Rather than feeling like it is the distraction you have to have after that stressful morning,you get to choose whether you want to eat it.
Result = You immediately see the benefit of this intention and feel empowered to keep up the PRACTICE.

So take the pressure off with a smaller number of New Year’s Intentions that can be reasonably achieved and still make profound changes in your life. Here are a few suggestions of Radical Intentions for Self-Love!

 

Radical Intentions for Self-Love

  • Let go of worrying about what others think.
    • Not everyone will like you or always like the choices you make. Stay true to your values and know that you are doing the right thing.
  • Don’t “Should” all over yourself.
    • As in, “I should go to the gym today”. “Should” represents some externally imposed expectation and comparing ourselves to a perceived cultural ideal and can make us resentful of our own imposed requirements to be a “better” person. Instead of “should” statements ask yourself, “What would be most loving to myself right now?”.
  • Accept what is.
    • When we accept what is we allow ourselves to be in the flow with life rather than resisting what is. There are things that we can change about our lives, but often it takes time to make those changes and we have to be patient with ourselves. And then there are the things we can’t change. For both the things we can and the things we can’t change, accepting what is releases us from wasting all that time and energy getting frustrated and annoyed.
  • Be in the present moment.
    • Probably one of the most powerful intentions you could practice. Being in the present moment lowers stress levels, opens you up to more joy, allows you to make better choices, and let’s you see the beauty around you.

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